taking it easy

After some errands earlier in the day, I'm trying to take it easy. I had a bit of a breakdown last night. I felt like everything that had been passing though my mind over the past week all eclipsed around 3AM. I was thinking about how I felt I had disappointed both my parents and Jared during the visit last weekend, about how being on edge had led me to lose control, and be irrational and unfair at least twice, about how I was leaving the job that was my foundation in Chicago, about how I was losing my fairly comfortable income and entering extreme debt, about how I was starting something I've never done before and have no practical experience in.

I sat down and cried. It was all too much.

So tonight I spent time with Gweniviere, I watched the amazing clouds as the sun set, I had a glass of wine, I played music, which I carelessly sang and danced to.

Please don't mistake me--I am tremendously excited about starting this new chapter in my life. I am thrilled that I will be learning to do something that has a tangible impact on people's lives...something that will hopefully allow me to make the world a better place.

But sometimes life comes in gulps rather than sips. It's a big change and I'm trying it to take it the best I can.